Radio Silence


When my grandfather passed, I slept
every night, waiting for the dream.
Tick, tick
a mantle clock counts the night.
He sits in silence, laying out a game
of solitaire.
He knows I’m waiting for a seat.
We have a conversation about his life
I was happy, I woke up.
I was happy.
It was death done right.

When you passed, I slept again.
Every morning hour.
I imagine you were busy with others.
I’ve tried to force you, fight the image,
fabricate you
in the seconds before I drift. I’ve
caught the sleeve of your arm and ripped
your shirt to shreds – I’m selfish.
Your voice should appear
telling me things you need me to hear,

Hello? Bad signal? I’ll call later.

But later never came, and I continue,
sleeping like a dead man. And maybe,
maybe, that’s the point
when death is done so wrong.